Pick a Priest before a Priest Picks You

When the combined number of years Jeng and I attended Catholic school exceeds our age, it becomes obvious that a large portion of our lives were immersed in Catholic traditions. So it was without question that our marriage would begin in a church. This past weekend, we began the Catholic wedding preparation journey with a visit to Sts. Peter and Paul Church, where our ceremony will take place.
I never attended mass at Sts. Peter and Paul and did not know the clergy so I took a gamble when I called to inquire about the church. Fr. Jorge* was the one that answered my call.

I'm always nervous when approaching a priest. Guilt for my sins? Yea probably. But also because my priestly encounters have ranged from scary and daunting to friendly and jovial. And then I remembered the movie License to Wed, and had visions of a nightmarish wedding preparation course full of awkward conversations and instigated arguments. Luckily Fr. Jorge is no Robin Williams. Instead he is an elderly Italian-American man who moves at his own pace.

A sweet man, Fr. Jorge took awhile to understand our geographical and timing situation. I didn't blame him, its not simple. With neither of us living in SF permanently, squeezing in marriage prep classes is difficult. Then as I attempted to make an appointment, I realized he doesn't respond well to messages or voice mails. (I think his hearing isn't the greatest.) And I highly doubt he has e-mail. I didn't want to be ageist and judge him for being too old. (I hate being perceived as too young.) So as we sat with him to discuss the requirements for a Catholic wedding, I had to constantly remind myself to be patient.

He gave us a book with church readings and explained how to choose from readings A, B and C by reading examples. Jeng was worried he was going to read the whole book. He convinced us to do a full mass instead of just a ceremony since we're both Catholic. "Its a difference of 15 minutes," he said. Then he explained how he prefers to do all the readings himself, rather than having us choose people who may be nervous and read too fast or too quietly. Now Jeng and I are secretly hoping our ceremony doesn't drag on for hours.

Our theme for the wedding weekend is very modern tech. How much should that theme carry over to our ceremony? I suppose not at all since the ceremony is full of tradition. But the generational gap is hard to ignore so we're on the fence about whether to stick with Fr. Jorge or inquire about another priest -- maybe younger? And/or Filipino to understand our cultural traditions? I can't imagine God being very happy with my picky priest tastes. Plus, how does one go about firing one? I'm not quite sure what to do but I will pray about it.

*Name has been changed to protect the innocent . . . read more.

[Poll] "Climb up on my faithful steed..."

Now that we've officially picked a date and settled on a location we've started to divert our attention to other matters. This includes wedding party attire, some wedding day surprises, and the all important bachelor party (and I guess bachelorette party, too, but whatever). I'm sure all these will be mentioned in future blogs at some point so this post will focus on another item we've been considering: wedding party transportation. Since unicorns no longer exist, we are trying to think of other ways to make Eileen's wedding unique.

One of the options Eileen suggested was asking one of the groomsmen - Rich - if we could borrow his Porsche. I vetoed the idea. While I like the thought of possibly saving money on transportation, I don't want to do it at the expense of friends and family. And I also don't want all the groomsmen sitting on my lap to fit in the car.

In order to fit more people, the traditional wedding mode of transportation is the limousine. But this is San Francisco and since Eileen is we're tree-hugging hippie wannabes, we wondered, "What would Al Gore do?" Yup, stretch Prius. We are currently looking to see if this is available in our area.

One vehicle that I'm pretty sure is available is everyone's favorite human transporter, the Segway. We considered this for a bit but a number of issues prevent this from being a viable option. First, the distance from the church to the hotel is rather far and we'd have to take back roads all the way. Second, we'd have to wear helmets and wouldn't want to ruin Eileen's hair. And finally, we'd look pretty stupid. Imagine a wedding party of 14 people traveling single file down the El Camino Real. On second thought, maybe we'd look pretty awesome.

So those are the options we're exploring. What do you think we should roll in on?


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The Date Debate

Jeng's birthday is on 1/04. Mine is 9/14. Both have a 1 and a 4. Add those together and its my favorite number: 5. Coincidence? Yea probably.

While we obviously didn't have any choice in our birth dates, we did have a say in our wedding date. We officially became boyfriend-girlfriend (aka "going steady") on 12/12/04 and then were engaged on 8/08/08. It was logical for us to pick another memorable date as the one we would have to remember for all eternity.

To further make things difficult, this date needed to be: 1) On a Friday or Saturday because everyone would hate us for picking a Wednesday wedding date; and 2) Between June and September 2010 since we agreed to wait until I graduate and before I start a job. (Because if all goes well, I'll be starting a job by the Fall of 2010.) We weren't left with very many options.

Once we took a million other things into consideration (ie. planet alignment, Jeng's 'time of the month', religious and cultural holidays and sporting events, etc.), we finally settled on: Friday, 7/9/10. So friends, if you're wondering why this blog is a bit off-schedule from the others... take a look at the time stamp. A year from now, we'll be hitched. Weird.

You may be thinking: "WTF. Friday!? I have to take a day off from my precious place of employment?!" Consider this. First, do you really hate an excuse to take PTO? And second, its the fourth of July the weekend before so you should already have Monday off. With this Friday wedding, you'll have the perfect excuse for an extra-short week. And for those travelling... even better: just take the whole week off! We have plenty of family fun activities planned... especially for the weekend after.

The date debate has ended. Contracts are signed. Dollars have been dropped. Now we just need you to save the date! And to make it even easier... here's
an Outlook invite to put in your calendar. :)
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Coming Soon

This link is coming soon. Check back in a little bit. . . . read more.

Guest Book

Feel free to sign our guest book by leaving a comment. . . . read more.

Our 'Last Year of Independence' (aka Engagement) Party

In 2002, my sister and I had a 'rock star' fourth of July celebration in SF with our close friends. It was a party we will always remember. This year, we decided to use this special date for another memorable celebration -- our last year of independence. Also known as our engagement.

Over 70 of our friends and family gathered at my newly-renovated parents house in Los Altos. While Jeng's family accounted for over half of those in attendance, we were also joined by many of our close friends, and members of my family. Two of my aunts, my cousin Joy and her kids also came into town from Vegas.

(Side story: Last summer, Jeng's parents were in Vegas and visiting Jeng's dad's goddaughter. This goddaughter was looking through his camera at our pictures from Europe and said, "Hey! That's Eileen!" It turns out, Jeng's dad's goddaughter is my cousin Joy. Apparently my aunts worked with Jeng's dad and grandma back in the late 80s. Small world! Jeng and I can probably be found in pictures together as kids. I probably stole things and/or did not share with him and made him cry. At least that's how we imagine it. Anyway luckily, as far as we know, Jeng and I are not related.)

Back to the BBQ. It was a pot luck so with 70 people you can imagine we had a ton of food. The centerpiece of our meal were two lovely little roasted piggies (aka Lechon de Leche). One was dressed as the groom and the other, the bride -- complete with tux, veil and lipstick. One was fat (the groom) and the other dark (the bride). They were delicious.

To accompany our extraordinary amount of food, we also had a ton of beverages -- alcoholic and non. In order to ensure consumption of these alcoholic beverages, we decided to play a couple rounds of beer pong (classy, I know.) and my own version of Hip Hip Hooray from Wowowee on the Filipino Channel. Two of the kids (Kat Kat and Carena) ended up winning the latter game. Their prize: No shots of vodka. Lucky girls.

Lastly, the BBQ would not be complete without a good toss into the pool. Jeng and Jeff were the victims. Hurt in the crossfire was a bottle of Fat Tire and Oliver's shirt. Diana and Erica attempted to toss me in the pool but were faced with my evil side and quickly backed off.

Thanks again to all those who came, ate, and enjoyed. Special thanks to: Jeng's parents, the Icasianos, and the Nguyens for providing the tables/chairs; Jeff for grilling the meat and oysters; my parents for working long and hard to prepare the house; Auntie Auring, Auntie Bet and the Coletti family for traveling from Vegas; and to everyone who brought food and drinks to share. The party of 70 was so much fun.. we can only imagine how much fun it will be with 200! . . . read more.